So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
