maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
