My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Man, jail baloney is awful.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Randomize
