that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
