the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize