Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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