she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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