508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
