Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
