The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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