I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
