i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Mom said you looked used
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize