Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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