My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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