When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
