You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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