When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize