Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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