are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
