Can Purell be used as lube?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Randomize
