I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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