This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
whose ass print is on the piano?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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