hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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