I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
