Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
