Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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