its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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