Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
