I am in a vortex of obligation.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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