Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
