The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize