he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
