So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
