last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
