I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
