ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize
