Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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