me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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