Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
