very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize