i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
