Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
