I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
