youre lurking in front of me
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
