Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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