: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
