if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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