Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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