Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
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