And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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