Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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