nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
